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A new way of driving an old car

If you have an old car then this is the way to drive it. Put it on a horse cart and sit on the driving seat and enjoy your journey.

Introducing car insulation

Try this new insulation introduced in cars it will prevent the car to get heated from sunlight. The Ac will perform more and even the tyres would not get heated.............................

Some more funny jokes

Did you hear about hte new French tank?

Yeah, It has 14 gears. 13 go in reverse, and one goes foreward incase the enemy attacks from behind.

Where does the one legged waitress work?

The Ihop

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?

Damn

A blonde walked into a bar

OUCHH!!!

A french fry walks into the bar and says to the bartender "Hay , could I get a beer please"

The barthened looks at him shacking his head and say "No, we don't serve food here"

A mushroom walks into the bar and says to the bartender "Hay , could I get a beer please" The barthened looks at him shacking his head and say "No, we don't serve food here" The mushroom says "Why not I'm a Fungi!"

Some Funny Jokes

Sam: Would you punish me for some thing i didn't do?
Teacher: no, of course not.
Sam: good, because i didn't do my homework. (Scott)


Johnny, George, and Bert were driving along in their pickup when they saw a sheep caught in the fence with its hind end up in the air.
Bert said, "I wish that was Sharon Stone."
George echoed, "I wish it was Demi Moore."
Little Johnny sighed, "I wish it was dark . . . "


Q: What do you do when your wife's staggering?
A: Shoot her again.


Q: What is the difference between and Virgin and a washing machine?
A: The washing machine doesn't follow you around for two weeks after you dump a load in it!


Mickey goes to the judge after speaking to him before about getting a divorce with Minney. The judge says "I'm sorry Mickey but I couldn't find grounds for divorce for being insane. Mickey looks stunned and says "I didn't say she was insane I said she was fuc**** Goofy

The Tea Party

To al the Parents and Grandparents out there !!!!
THE TEA PARTY
When I was a toddler, someone had given me a little Tea Set as a gift, and it was one of my favorite toys.
Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought him a little cup of "tea" which was just water, of course.
After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Mom came home. My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch his little Princess bring him a cup of tea, because it was, "Just the cutest thing!"
My Mom waited, and sure enough, here I come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy.
She watches him drink it up and then says, "Did it ever occur to you that the only place that a toddler can reach to get water is the toilet?"
THE END (I hear you laughing!)

9jokes that can be told in a church

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life." The child thought about this for a moment then said, "So why the groom wearing black?"
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!" While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushed herself off, and started running again! As she ran she once again began to pray "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late...But please don't shove me either!"
Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50." The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100." The third boy says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!"
An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead."
A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?" He answered, "Call for backup."
A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A small child replied, "They couldn't get a baby-sitter."
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "Honor thy father and thy mother," she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she said, "Johnny, what is the matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."
Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff?" The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It's probably just your Dad."
You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing! Take heed and pass these along to people who need a laugh.

Plane Flight

Bill Clinton, Hilary Clinton, Al Gore, and Tipper Gore were on a plane flight, looking down at the world.
Bill Clinton said, "ya know, I could drop a $10,000 bill out the window and make one person very happy."
And Hilary replied, "Yes, but I could drop 10 $1,000 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy."
Then Al Gore said, "Well I could drop 100 $100 bills out the window and make 100 people very happy."
And Tipper responds, "I could drop all three of you out the window and make the whole country happy!"

Comedy movies that can make you laugh out loudly

Check out here I provide you the list of top comedy movies. I hope you will agree to me when you watch them.


1. The Princess Bride

This movie is a new classic, with a bit of something for everyone - intrigue, magic, swordfights, true love and even kissing. A host of big name actors make their appearances including Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, André the Giant, Mandy Patinkin, Peter Falk, and Billy Crystal. For even more fun, check out the book the movie was based on.

2. Some Like It Hot

Marilyn Monroe, Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis star in this light hearted movie filmed in 1959. Lemmon and Curtis join a women's band in drag to avoid the mob and one of them falls for Monroe. It's hysterically funny and includes some wonderful musical numbers.

3. Toy Story

Don't let the computer animation fool you - this movie is not just for kids. Toy Story is one of those rare movies that appeals to all ages and has jokes for the kids while still entertaining adults.

4. Liar Liar

Jim Carrey stars as a lawyer who can not lie for a full 24 hours during one of the most important cases in his career. Although the plot breaks down at the end, there is a hilarious physical comedy scene where Carrey beats himself up in a courthouse bathroom.

5. Young Frankenstein

This spoof of classic horror films is directed by Mel Brooks and stars Gene Wilder, Teri Garr, Marty Feldman, and Madeline Kahn. The grandson of the infamous Dr. Frankenstein (Wilder) follows in his grandfathers footsteps with unexpected results.

6. Office Space

The office politics jokes in this movie hit so close to home that you will never look at your cubicle or your manager the same way again. This comedy has a truly inspired scene where the three protagonists get their revenge on a lousy fax machine. Look for Jennifer Aniston in a funny Rachel-esque role as a frustrated waitress.

7. Chicken Run

This British-made stop-motion animation (or 'claymation') film is aimed to entertain both children and adults. The hens, tired of being potential food, struggle to break out of their chicken farm with the help of an American newcomer who can fly. Don't plan on having chicken soup for lunch if you watch this one!

8. Galaxy Quest

Even if you're not a Trekkie you will enjoy this funny parody of science fiction TV shows. The stars of the cancelled Galaxy Quest TV show are transported into space by aliens in distress who think the shows are real and the actors are heroes. Sigourney Weaver turns in a surprisingly funny performance along with Tim Allen and Alan Rickman.

9. Roxanne

This updated version of the classic Cyrano De Bergerac stars Steve Martin and Daryl Hannah. The script is sweetly funny and offbeat. Even though we know how it will end, the journey is still worthwhile.

10. Pretty Woman

This modern day Cinderella story is the movie that put Julia Roberts on the map. Richard Gere stars as a tough executive who hires a call girl (Roberts) for the weekend. They discover they have more in common than they bargained for, and their business deal turns into something more.

Believe it or not- foes have become friends

Look the cat is with cute little ducklings and it is looking at them and not harming them this thing is not common in every day life.

The Baboon is holding cat like its baby an the cat is not getting afraid of it.

The dog and cats are very fierce enemies,

here it is proven wrong it looks like they are very close friends.

The mouse and cat sitting together and cat is

not harming the mouse this thing cannot be

found anywhere else.

A cat sitting with a sparrow, amazing isn't it.

Cat sitting on helmet of a man driving bike looks

absolutely cool.

Cat sitting in dogs legs and not being affraid of it.

A dog is liking a baby cat like her mother.

A lion is hugging a man, don't try it if you find one.

Short but funny jokes (part 3)

Headmaster: I've had complaints about you, Johnny, from all your teachers. What have you been doing?
Johnny: Nothing, sir.
Headmaster: Exactly.


Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?"
Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?


Patient: Doctor! You've got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say.
Doctor: Next please!


Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.
Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.


The doctor to the patient: 'You are very sick'
The patient to the doctor: 'Can I get a second opinion?'
The doctor again: 'Yes, you are very ugly too...' I use this joke for retelling in reported speech.


My friend said he knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith. So I asked him "What was the name of his other leg?"


A family of mice were surprised by a big cat. Father Mouse jumped and said, "Bow-wow!" The cat ran away. "What was that, Father?" asked Baby Mouse. "Well, son, that's why it's important to learn a second language."


Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things.
Boy: What are the two things?
Girl: Your feet.


A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn't.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.

Short but funny jokes (part 2)

Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.


Teacher: Did you father help your with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.


A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?
B: It's a girl. She's my daughter.
A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father.
B: I'm not. I'm her mother.


A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"


Man: I could go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself.
Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let's start from your bank account.


Son: Dad, what is an idiot?
Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me?
Son: No.


A: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi.
B: Yes, sir. You are a taxi.


Teacher: "Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"
Nick: "What do you think it is, Sir?"
Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"
Nick: "I don't think I know either, Sir!"

Short but funny jokes (part 1)

Two cows are standing in a field.
One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?"
The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"


Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
Student: I is the....Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.


A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live.
"The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."


A: Do you want to hear a dirty joke?
B: Ok
A: A white horse fell in the mud.


If big elephants have big trunks, do small elephants have suitcases?


On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed.
"What's the matter? Are you sick?" he asked.
"No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see old ladies standing."

pics of political mergers

Bill and Hallary

George Bush and John Mc Cain

A game of intelligence

A blonde chick found herself sitting next to a lawyer on an airplane. Bored, the lawyer kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence (lawyers like easy prey). Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers he’d give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, “What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?” Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5.
The blonde then asked, “What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?”

The lawyer looked puzzled. He spent nearly an hour, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls, trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00

The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, “What is the answer to your question?”
Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5

Humorous judgement

A young trial lawyer was defending a man accused of burglary, known for being witty (and the judge knows this) tried yet another one of his creative defenses. The judge, while not known for having a sense of humor, decided to here the young lawyer out.

“While my client admits he did, in fact, reach his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. However his arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by just his limb.”

“Well put,” the judge replied. “Using your logic, I sentence the defendant’s arm to one year’s imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he so chooses.”

The defendant smiled. With his lawyer’s assistance he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.

How to please a women (intersting view)

A new, special kind of store just opened up in a Manhatten shopping center. This store sells husbands, yes that’s right - women can browse men from floors of choices.
Actually, there are 6 floors of men, and with an increase in the floor level bringing an positive attributes… a nifty setup - with a catch. As you open the door to any floor, you may choose a man from that floor but if you go up, you cannot go back down except to exit the building. Interesting, right?

So a young woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.
On the first floor the sign on the door reads:Floor 1 - These men have jobs. The woman reads the sign and says to herself, “Well, that’s better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what’s further up?” So up she goes.

The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids. The woman remarks to herself, “That’s great, but I wonder what’s further up?” And up she goes again.

The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking. “Hmmm, better” she says. “But I wonder what’s upstairs?”

The fourth floor sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework. “Wow!” exclaims the woman, “very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!” And again she heads up another flight.

The fifth floor sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak. “Oh, mercy me! But just think… what must be awaiting me further on?” So up to the sixth floor she goes.

The sixth floor sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 7,548,652 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor only exists as proof that women are impossible to please.

Jokes

This guy goes skydiving for the first time. After he jumps out of the
plane, he counts to ten, pulls the ripcord, and nothing happens. Only
a little worried, he pulls the cord for the auxiliary parachute, but
unfortunately, the chute still does not appear. As he is plummeting
toward the Earth, he sees a woman coming up the other way. He shouts to
her "Do you know anything about parachutes?" "No", she says, "do you
know anything about gas stoves?"
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While driving along the back roads of a small town, two Arkansas truckers came to an overpass with a sign that read CLEARANCE 11'3". They got out and measured their rig, which was 12'4".
"What do you think?" one asked the other.
The driver looked around carefully, then shifted into first."Not a cop in sight. Let's take a chance!"

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On a shopping trip to the city a backwoods farmer bought a 24-piece jigsaw puzzle. He worked on it every night for two weeks. Finally, the puzzle was finished.
"Look what I've don, Jess," he said proudly to a visiting neighbor.
"That's surely somethin', Willard. How long did it take you?"
"Only two weeks."
"Never done a puzzle myself," Jess said. "Is two weeks fast?"
"Darn tootin'," Willard said. "Look at the box. It says, 'From two to four years."

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Check the new tyres for your car

These tyres will resist against weather and can take your car any where.

New Funny pics

This Car has one Horse Power.

Any thing can happen in football even an invisibleman can play

In memory of the great Twin Towers.

Cats are innocent and stupid!!!!!!!!

Some Funny Pics

Human Skin Shoes

Ninja Turtle is busted by cops

The Extereme of computer love

Practicing kiss for future dating

Cutooooooooo

Cops are Stupid!!!!!

Big Mama dance show!!!!!

The largest Paper Boat in the world.

As a kid, I used to make paper boats, which also doubled as hats, from newspapers with my grandfather. Take a look, This particular paper boat was made by German artist Frank Boelter, and is made entirely from Tetrapack (the material used for milk cartons). He claims it should stay afloat for about 40 days, which is far better than the 40 seconds my newspaper boats would float.

Eiffel Tower made of Match Sticks.

Its hard to imagine that how they have joined the match stick togethher. Its a master piece of its own kind.

Funny Hair Styles

Student Knits her own Ferrari

Art graduate Lauren Porter knitted a Ferrari sportscar for her honours degree at Bath Spa University.
The classic red bodywork consists of 250 squares of garter stitch made by Lauren and 20 family members and friends.The windows are V-shaped stocking stitch, while the details are crochet and the badge is embroidered.
It's all supported by a steel frame which Lauren, 22, of Greatham, Hants, welded herself.

Top 10 Hollywood Actors

1. Tom Hanks

Famous Movies:

1. Toy Story (1995)
2. Saving Private Ryan (1998)
3. Apollo 13 (1995)
4. Toy Story 2 (1999)
5. Green Mile (1999)
6. Cast away (2000)
7. The Di Vinci Code (2006)









2. Denzel Washington


Famous Movies:


1. Glory (1989)
2. Malcolm X (1992)
3. Courage Under Fire (1996)
4. Inside Man (2006)
5. The Great Debators (2007)

3. Harrison Ford

Famous Movies:

1. Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
2. Star Wars (1977)
3. Star Wars Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980)

4. Conversation, The (1974)

4. Nicholas Cage

Famous Movies:

1. Adaptation. (2002)
2. Rumble Fish (1983)
3. Face/Off (1997)
4. Raising Arizona (1987)
5. WindTalkers (2002)

5. Al Pacino

Famous Movies:

1. Godfather, The (1972)
2. Godfather: Part II, The (1974)
3. Serpico (1973)
4. Dog Day Afternoon (1975)

6. Jim Carrey

Famous Movies:

1. Truman Show, The (1998)

2. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (2004)

3. Liar Liar (1997)

4. Dr. Seuss Horton hears a who! (2008)

7. Tom Cruise

Famous Movies:

1. Rain Man (1988)

2. Mongolia (1999)

3. The Last Sumarai (2001)

4. The War of the Worlds (2005)

5. Collateral (2004)

8. Robbin Williams

Famous Movies:

1. Alladin (1992)

2. Jumanji (1998)

3. Goodwill Hunting (1997)

4. Happy Feet (2006)

5. Hamlet (1996)

9. Jack Nicholson

Famous Movies:

1. China Town (1974)

2. One flew over the Cukko's nest (1975)

3. The Departed (2006)

10. Matt Damon

Famous Movies:

1. The Departed (2006)

2. Saving private Ryan (1998)

3. The Bourne Ultimate (2007)